Toshiba writes to tell us it aims to creates value for people and promote lifestyles in harmony with the Earth, presumably by causing them to recycle their lunch after reading such pretentious twaddle.
Normally, what are known in the trade as 'motherhood' paragraphs stuck on the end of press releases can be safely deleted. This one, however, provides a paradigm shift into world-class, core-competency leveraging eco-waffle, written using recycled pixels from sustainable font forests.
Toshiba Group, we learn, is a Corporate Citizen of the Planet Earth. Well gosh, they aren't based on Pluto after all, apart from the marketing department, obviously. The company is committed to realizing a better environment, guided by 'Toshiba Group Environmental Vision 2050', which as far as I can see, means it plans to reduce pollution to a tenth of 2000 levels by 2050, which gives it another 42 years to carry on pumping out nasty toxins with gay abandon.
The Group also aims to reduce projected CO2 emissions by a total equivalent to an almost insignificant 117.7 million tons - the equivalent of 271,825 fully-laden Boeing 747s - a year by 2025, through the development of 'environmentally conscious' home appliances and office equipment.
This sounds alarming.
Domestic appliances are troublesome enough already without them developing the power of conscious thought. I'm not at all keen on a TV that refuses to let you watch a programme because it doesn't approve of it, or a microwave that spurns all attempts to warm up a Chinese takeaway because it thinks it's bad for you.
Descending for a moment from the snow-capped mountains of eco-pontification, clutching an adorable baby polar bear, Toshiba also informs us that it has launched a couple of disk drives. X
That motherhood paragraph in full:
Toshiba Group, a Corporate Citizen of the Planet Earth, is committed to realizing a better environment. Guided by 'Toshiba Group Environmental Vision 2050' the Group is implementing measures to boost environmental efficiency by 10 times in FY2050, against the benchmark of FY2000. The core target is to reduce projected CO2 emissions by a total equivalent to 117.7 million tons a year by FY2025, through the development and sales of highly efficient power supply equipment and systems, and the manufacture of environmentally conscious home appliances and office equipment. By working to mitigate global warming, make efficient use of resources and control management of chemicals, Toshiba Group creates value for people and promotes lifestyles in harmony with the Earth.
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